Pondering Reality...

I know this site is notorious for its comedic/satirical, rather than overtly intellectual, content. Over the past month I've been mulling around numerous thoughts which have sprung up from my Psychology and Philosophy classes.

First and foremost, the human body is an amazing creation. How it came to be has been endlessly debated for well over a century and a half. Was it evolution? Was it the hand of God? Well, I'm not here to enter the fray of life's origin. I'm just here to posit some of my thoughts for you to chew on. Whether you swallow or spit is really your choice.

My studies have revealed how the human body is constantly evolving. I do not mean over periods of centuries or millennia, I mean during one's lifetime. The human brain is an excellent example with how it rewires and alters its shape and functionality based on stimuli. In effect, our thoughts control and affect us. We are the products of reason, thinking, and reaction.

Now I've believed as far back as I can remember that we create our own realities. There is no real right or wrong. It is what we instill faith in which makes something real. Examples are God creating the universe versus the entire process coming about from a raw, untamed force of energy exploding outward in a "Big Bang". For some the former is real. For others it is the latter. We build our lives around beliefs, create realities from thought.

Where does thought come from? Perception. But what we perceive is governed by the flesh we find ourselves in. What we see, hear, taste, smell, and feel is radically different from other species and thus not real to them. Our reality is not their reality. It is solely ours. Does that make it more important? Does that humble us in knowing there are shared realities? In fact, how would our realities look should our eyes be capable of seeing beyond the limited spectral plain we now perceive or if we were unable to taste.

Philosophy and science can be difficult subjects to bring together. Science requires true quantifiable evidence leading to a single answer for phenomena whereas philosophy is open to interpretation. What philosophy has shown me is how we structure our conscious realities around us, try to explain the reasons we act. Yet science would say we do not act but simply react. We have been reacting since the "Big Bang", or God's shove (whichever you prefer). Every action has been the result of a prior action, known in philosophy as Determinism. Without a prior act a future act cannot be. If one were to follow this theory to its end, then all action began from one single action yet if action cannot happen without prior action then how can action be at all? Surely everything has a beginning and end. But what if that is merely our view of reality corrupting what it truth? We measure time, action, and event based on temporal structure: past, present, future. Does time really function that way or is it merely a construct of our reality based on limited perception? What if life is truly a circle, constant renewal, growth, collapse, etc. What if there is no beginning, no end, but a constant. Science says energy can neither be created nor destroyed. How did this all arise? Is growth impossible? Collapse as well?

In fact, what if our lifetime is the equivalent of a small town nestled in a valley upon the whole of the Earth. All we see and know is what happens in and around us yet we are part of something larger despite not perceiving it. We cannot see what we believe to be tomorrow over the ridge nor yesterday because of a shroud of mist. Yet it is there just as we are. What if every point functions at the same time yet we cannot perceive it. What if time really is more frequency than passing, layers rather a one way road. What if all were now and as easy to touch as the screen you read this upon.

What interests me most about the human form is its ability to manipulate energy, mostly at the subconscious or unconscious level. Thoughts, sensations, sight, etc. are all nothing more than the body converting energy into electrical, chemical, or some other form which is then deciphered and translated by the brain. Our bodies are repositories of energy. Our souls, that initial spark struck by the union of sperm and egg, flares in our flesh. Thus our soul is really manipulated energy. That force out there in space which governs gravity, light, and so much more at the macro level is within us at a sort of micro level. Yet our manipulation of energy is more than the simple process of chemical reaction, kinetic power, or electrical discharge. We manipulate energy into sentience; consciousness. What does that truly mean? In manipulating energy into creating our personalities what does that say about our flesh? What does that say about death? If energy cannot be destroyed do we dissipate into all things? Do we rejoin some lost galactic whole? Or does our energy signature somehow hold? Do we become a packet of energy, like a transmission, which holds together and continues to survive beyond the flesh? If we were to continue beyond physical death what would that type of existence be like?

Science has shown energy is useless without the physical. The physical manipulates energy, turning into a thing of creation. Could life be the evolution of energy? Could we be giving thought to that once raw, unbridled force? From destruction comes construction.

And what does this say concerning the prior subject of Determinism? If everything can only happen due to a prior act, then do we really have choice? Are we bound by some fate instigated eons ago which continues to play on through us? And if we have no choice then are our thoughts really illusions? If we cannot change things, if we have no control over events, then our thoughts can't truly be unique but the combination of prior events, actions, and material. Thus we serve no purpose for ourselves but only for whatever began the process yet if the process began blindly then we are all struggling forward blindly. Is the individual really real or does it exist simply because that is how we perceive the process of existence?

Energy has evolved and continues to do so through the physical world, but if we truly do have some control over it through our bodies then imagine when we are able to consciously manipulate it. I do not mean through machines but by thought. If all began because of some prior event, mindlessly started perhaps, what if our will became powerful enough to break the onward cycle and we became strong enough to alter our reality beyond perception.

So many large ideas. So much muddling and meandering. What do I truly believe? All I can say is I believe in the right to discover. That is the only way to learn.

Just Suppose

Just suppose you were a psychotherapist and you had never heard or read anything about the dogma of Christianity.

Just suppose you had a client who is explaining his internal world to you.

Just suppose he had told you he often has conversations with a man who died over 2000 years ago.

Just suppose you question your client as to what this person looked like and he answers he does not know. When you question his not knowing, he answers "The man I speak to is invisible."

Just suppose you ask him for more details about this invisible man and he answers that the invisible man was his own father and son and the Holy Ghost all at the same time.

Just suppose you press for more information and you are told that this invisible person is really three people but remains one.

Just suppose your client tells you that this invisible man's mother never had sexual relations yet gave birth to this man.

Just suppose your client tells you when asked where this invisible man lives that he tells you he lives up there in the stratosphere.

Just suppose your client tells you that once a week he partakes in the ritual of eating this man's flesh and drinking his blood in a mass ceremony with many other people.

Just suppose your client tells you that he will never die because he is going to a place where people will live forever.

Just suppose your client tells you that even though his body will be consumed his soul, that is also invisible, will live forever.

Just suppose your client tells you that he will meet all of his deceased friends and relatives in this place high above the clouds.

Just suppose the client tells you that twice a week he visits a man, who is unseen, in a little cubicle to listen to the crimes he has committed during the week. If the crimes are severe he is told to say a "Hail Mary" prayer ten times depending upon the gravity of the crime and they will be excused.

Just suppose your client tells you that there are certain laws he must follow or he will be punished in a sea of fire for eternity.

Just suppose your client tells you that there is a certain man called the Devil who watches over him in that sea of fire to be sure he suffers.

Just suppose your client tells you that it is okay to suffer pain during your lifetime because he will be rewarded for his suffering after he dies.

Just suppose you have to diagnose your client for a Mental Status Exam, what would be your diagnoses?

A return to school

So it is seeming more and more a reality that I am going to be returning to college this Fall. Yes, yes, I am more than likely going to start towards my Psychology degree and the excitement is taking even me by surprise. I'm loving the possibilities this is opening for my future. Likewise, it is a subject I excel at. Large parts of my family are unstable/dysfunctional and I have seen my fair share of mental meltdowns. Hell, I nearly had a breakdown two years ago but that is an entirely different story.

I'm not a stranger to the field. I took enough classes during my first degree that Psychology was nearly a minor. One of my fave classes was Abnormal Psych, which I wrote a paper for regarding the mental health of Ivan the Terrible. I also took a Russian History class not long afterwards leading me to the realization that Drozny, Ivan's nickname, meant feared. Funny part is feared can be taken either in the negative, the Terrible, or positive, revered. Funny little culture isn't it? I did a psych profile on the Russian nation along with others regarding my political classes. If one would simply take history into perspective and view nations as organic entities, you'd be surprised how well you can come to understand a people.

I've always applied psychology to my writing. I got into a major argument with the collegiate faculty over my thesis last Fall. Some professors just don't want the human perspective added to any equation.

I'm so tired of having to view human beings as nothing more than statistics. I want to get my hands dirty. I want to experience the myriad of personalities out there; see the soul in all its forms. Mankind fascinates me. What makes us who we are? What forms those gears, causes them to turn?

The scary part? I'm not into this field to make millions coddling the fragile, bruised egos of the pampered aristocracy whose only malady is infections caused by sycophantic parasites whose attention causes their highnesses mental capacities to atrophy. I want to wade into darker waters. I want to stare into those empty eyes and see the abyss. Maybe in the fallen I can find some semblance of purpose. For them. For me. The damned aren't a warning. They are a lesson. I want to see what they can teach me.